H-town Teaching

I was really able to reflect over Thanksgiving break, about how lucky I am to have this opportunity right now. I’ve been a full-fledged teacher for about three months now, and I can’t imagine a job harder than this one. I also can’t imagine what my life would be like if I hadn’t met my students. Perhaps I would feel more normal and relaxed, and maybe I wouldn’t feel like I’m 23 going on 50. But I already know I wouldn’t trade this experience: watching my little tweens and teens get so invested in learning, watching them FINALLY get into my math and science songs I make up and awkwardly sing, watching the devastation in their faces when they’ve sincerely tried but failed, and watching the excitement that comes from true mastery…there’s nothing quite like it. We still have so much work to do, test scores are awful, but we’re making progress and for that I’m so thankful. But please, don’t judge me for DESPERATELY not wanting to go back to school tomorrow after such a wonderful Thanksgiving break!!!!!

I wish I could spend several weeks telling the kids all I’d learned from my time interning with an environmental advocacy organization so that they could apply the things from science to the real world (and maybe impress them enough so they’d finish their homework…). Alas, I had half an hour to introduce and wrap up global warming. I squeezed in a plug for walking, as a former NYC resident I can probably list it on a resume, and a student yelled out: “Miss! Don’t you get embarrassed when you have to walk?”  I was stunned, to say the least. My kids associate walking with a lack of funds for other modes of transport. One eighth grader met my eye as if to say “I like walking too, Miss!” but she couldn’t bring herself to share that with the rest of the class. I spent a few minutes doing damage control on the whole walking issue, “it’s cool guys, I swear! AND good for the environment and your health!!!” but I doubt I changed anyone’s mindset. I really do understand where they’re coming from, but it makes me appreciate how far we have to go to reducing greenhouse gas emissions. Oh man.

In other news…..

Student council elections were a bust–turns out only two out of my 15 kids running were even allowed to run based on conduct and grades. Really, how hard is it to go an entire six weeks without getting in-school suspension? As soon as the administration notified me about my kids, and asked me to cancel the elections, I got this horrible feeling…MUTINY! I could picture the next meeting–my future leaders with their “public-speaking” voices and their strong opinions using their powers for evil.  The administration had the same image, and decided they couldn’t let me walk into student council class with the new information alone. I had not one, but TWO administrators come to explain to the students why elections were cancelled. We discussed “Public” versus “Private” victories–why it’s important to be a winner for yourself, even if no one is looking…you basically get good grades and respect your teachers. There was, as predicted, a lot of screaming on the kids part. The counselor had to take three students out. But, a few of them understood the circumstances and took responsibility for their actions. If enough of my student council maintains good grades and goes without any conduct violations this next six weeks, we can have elections in January. Think it will happen? I sincerely hope so, I’m teaching this class until June and I want happy students on my hands!

“MISS, who are you voting for?” has been the question plaguing me for the last few weeks. Maintaining the mystery of who I’m voting for (or really who I voted for, today is November 5th) , coupled with the fact that HISD forbids teachers from sharing their political beliefs (or face serious consequences) obviously prevented me from telling my students. Of course that didn’t stop the kids from making predictions, many of which were associated with race: “She’s not black, she voted for the gringo (McCain)!”, “She’s sort of not white, so she probably voted for Obama,” or “Nahhh, I like her she must have voted for Obama.” Things are so black and white to them, figuratively and literally.

Last night, Americans and the electoral college elected Barack Obama as our 44th president. Regardless of who I voted for (now I bet you want to know!), and regardless of who YOU voted for, we can all recognize the significance of this election. It didn’t truly hit me until this morning, when I stood in front of my class of students eagerly waiting to discuss the election. As I looked around the room I knew FOR CERTAIN that these students could no longer make excuses for themselves. Someone like them, and someone like me (I am white hispanic, first generation American, grew up abroad, funny name, etc.), could reach the highest office in our country. And as I stood in front of them, explaining that because of all this they had to work harder than ever before, because I knew and now they knew the heights we could reach, that nothing and no one could ever stop them again, I began to cry. Not casual tears, but uncontrollable sobs. The students were confused, they didn’t know how to react to me crying…so they clapped, and clapped and clapped. And they were wonderful the rest of the day, they were quiet when I asked them to, asked for help when they needed it, finished their classwork and helped each other when they finished early. Today was a defining moment for me; I won’t look at my students, future presidents of this country, the same again. Yes we can.